Hair: likely the first of many posts on the subject

            I thought I would start off with a story from my childhood. It took me a surprisingly long time to realize I wasn't like the majority of white kids in my elementary school. One experience that really drove the message home occurred in the second grade. My brother and I were infatuated with a show called S Club 7 (yes, the other British 90's band gifted to us by the glorious Simon Fuller). My particular favorite character was Hannah, a sweet blond girl with the most adorable pixie cut. One afternoon after lounging in front of the TV for two hours reveling in the glory of Hannah's sassily shorn locks I decided I had to have her hair. Now this wouldn't have been a problem had I too been a floppy haired blond; instead, my head was covered in tight curls, especially down at the roots which hadn't been touched by my six-month relaxer touch-up. I ran upstairs and told my mother to "cut it all off." She was over the moon, likely believing I had chosen to embrace my natural hair texture, and completely in the dark about the Caucasian nature of my hair idol. 

My Hairspiration Hannah Spearritt

I smiled broadly while my mother chopped away at my chemically straightened hair, picturing myself with an Audrey Hepburn-esque crop, casually flipping my bangs out of my eyes. When I finally looked in the mirror I burst into tears. My head was covered in tiny, delicate curls. Where had they come from? What was wrong? Hadn't I told my mother exactly what I wanted? My poor mom was completely baffled by my anguish, it wasn't until I showed her a picture of the look I had been going for that she finally understood the impossibility of my expectations. 

The next day I sheepishly walked into school avoiding the stares of my classmates. At the time, I still didn't fully understand what had gone wrong but I knew that I was different. It may seem strange that a child wouldn't notice the most basic of differences, but I'm not completely sure it's a bad thing. Yes, it was a traumatic (and humbling) experience, but I wouldn't trade it for anything.

I think it's great that to kids racial differences are inconsequential but I also think that this experience points to a detriment of our society. When all I saw magazines, movies, and TV were white women it makes sense that I would mistake myself for white as well. I mean, what else was could I possibly have been?  For mixed race girls—as well as women of other minorities—the invisibility of diversity in the media perpetuates the "normalcy" of whiteness. How are girls supposed to recognize and embrace their ethnicity and their beauty if they view it as foreign? If anyone has an answer to that question or a similar story to share sound off in the comments. 

-Isy